Why Don’t Attorneys Eat Jail Food?

Yesterday, I was visiting a new client in the county jail and the jailers were serving lunch. I asked if I could have a plate and they said sure,, so I got a plate of jail food. Now mind you, the cuisine is not going to win any awards on food channel, but I found some things to be very interesting about jail food.

First I found that the jail food was in this case, a cheeseburger, bag of potato chips and a cup of ice tea. The cheeseburger actually was made of vegetable protein and not all that bad. A bag of chips is a bag of chips when economy is at issue and a cup of ice tea was really not bad. I was told by my client that this meal was one of the better meals they get. Interesting thing about that is why I didn’t see more attorneys in the holdover and why none of those “lawyers” bothered to even ask their clients about the food they receive, let alone sample it.

I have eaten food in more jails in Texas than most inmates and certainly more than any attorneys, but what amazes me most is no one talks about the condiments. I was told by my client that you can buy these items from commissary and you are gauged how important you are in the jail society by the amount of money you have “on the books”. I take for granted the fact that when I go to  eat out, there will be ketchup, mustard, salt, pepper and hot sauce,, but not in jail. What would happen if your server told you that you can pay extra for the condiments? Would you ever come back to that restaurant?

Anyway, I am not ashamed of eating jail food and think every lawyer, juror, prosecutor and Judge should have to sample it at least once. It might give these folks some insight into a world that few ever want to venture into. I mean, it might make the Judge more aware of say an inmate who requires a “low sodium diet”, or is Muslim or is vegetarian and allow the attorneys to file Motions for the clients to be able to follow their diets or religious beliefs. You know after all, a great amount of lip service is given to these words,,,  “everyone is presumed innocent until proven guilty”.  Now none of you readers really want to force an innocent man, woman or child to eat something that violates their very existence,, do you?

When it comes down to it, very few people, including “lawyers”, even want to go to the jail to visit people. I ask simply,, how can you defend a man, woman or child if you don’t spend time with them and get to know them?

The client will never care how much you know, until they know how much you care… Have a nice day, I’m off to court this morning.

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